Decisions

DH and I have been talking about our TTC efforts recently.  Basically, we agree that what we are doing isn't working and something needs to change.

After some more research, discussion with a doctor friend who frequently prescribes fertility meds, and a healthy dose of heartbreak and desperation, DH and I are revisiting the idea of Clomid.  We are still both a little skeptical of the risks, but we have been assured that the risks associated with using the minimum dose for only a few cycles are very, very small.  We are hoping that it will at least give me shorter, more regular cycles and thus give us more chances at conceiving a healthy baby.  Plus, it seems to be the only real option left to try before more invasive and expensive treatments, and it sure as heck is cheaper than adoption. 

SO, if we are not successful this cycle, we are going to give Clomid a go.  If the Clomid doesn't work, then we will move forward with foster-adoption this summer. 

The foster-adopt situation is another reason why I am willing to reconsider Clomid.  I'm afraid we might be at a bit of a roadblock when it comes to foster-adoption.  I have continued looking into it, and it seems like fostering-to-adopt a newborn would be nearly impossible for us right now.  The main obstacle:  one parent must be able to stay home full-time in order to receive a newborn placement.  While I knew going into this that a stay-at-home-parent was looked favorably upon, I did not realize that, in practice (in our area at least), it is essentially a requirement, because infants in foster care cannot go to daycare until they are 12 weeks old.  Another obstacle is my job.  I work in child welfare, and have direct access to every case file on every family in our county whose children are in foster care.  I'm not sure how this would affect our eligibility to foster parent, but I am pretty sure that's a gigantic conflict of interest.  So basically, I would either need to quit my job (which we absolutely cannot afford at this point, as much as I hate to admit that), find a new job (which is impossible in this economy -- I know, I've been looking for months), or win the lottery so we can afford a private adoption.  *SIGH*

So, that is pretty much where we are at right now:  one more cycle au naturale, a few tries with Clomid, then moving to foster-adoption and praying that somehow it will work out for us.

Someday, somehow, we ARE going to be parents.